what the hell is wrong? why do some relationships end up failing?
as a person who is currently in a relationship, I always wonder why people break up? Did they choose it? Or was it because those two people were not really meant for each other? I am always afraid to answer this question because I might not be able to answer exactly why when I would be questioned such as this “why did you two break up? “what happened?”
One of the trending topics on Twitter was the #whyrelationshipsfail. I clicked on it and found a mix of serious and funny reasons. In this post, I would try to analyze some of the answers of the Twitter users, and let’s just pass on the hilarious ones.
Twitter user #1: one person stops putting in the effort and then bam
Who is the one to be blamed here? I say we cannot immediately pinpoint it to men since they always say that men starts to show so much effort in the start but later on, when they get what they want or as time passes by, they stop. But what if the reason was because the woman started to show little affection? What if she was out there neglecting his small efforts because the man started to think bigger and he’s not just the romeo-like or the one who always try to woo his girl but he is busy doing efforts for the both of them? What if he wanted all the nice things for her so that someday she would live a happy and comfortable life even if he was gone?
If people really loved their partner, they would take a look deeper on why their partner do some things. They should continue on showing efforts even if they are of the smallest thing because they say that it’s the thought that counts. Grown up couples know that relationships are not purely based on the chocolates, flowers, teddy bears, or grand showcase of love, but in mutual understanding, respect, and love.
Twitter user #2: because nowadays, everyone lies, cheats, and play games. No one wants to commit and be true.
This is true… but not totally. There are still some people out there who remain loyal and faithful. They are too busy trying to maintain the relationship because its what they want when they grow old and they are contented already with the person. They are afraid to leave their partners because they believe they might not get the same quality of relationship again. They are too busy trying to reach their goals for themselves, for their family and for their future family. Cheating just don’t have a place in their mind. They firmly think that this will just lead to stressful and painful times.
But I would not argue that this not exist. Because it does! That’s why in the Philippines, there are lot of television shows and movies that involve third parties. They really click and grab the attention of the nation. Maybe because its prevalent? I don’t know. There are really stupid people out there who take on for granted their partners and love not more than they have loved before but more than one person. It’s simple. If you don’t love him or her anymore, just tell it to them. You won’t be a better person if you have many paramours.
Twitter user #3: People allow their insecurities and jealousy to get in their way.
This applies to all. We are all insecure and it is in our nature to get jealous. We are insecure because of what we see in our society. Society has ruined the true meaning of beauty equating it to good looks or the money we have in the bank. We are naturally jealous because we do not want to share to others what we have. We are protective by nature. We feel threatened when someone tries to get the people we have.
Personally, I was a really insecure boyfriend. For me, she was a goddess. My girl would really qualify to be in line with beautiful Greek goddesses. And there was I, a very plain type of guy. I was a nobody. I did not know how to love myself. I neglected myself thinking that no one would date me. I overcame this when she made me realize that I should feel more confident and love myself more. She said that what others think do not matter. She loves me for the real me and not what the society dictates on what type of guy she should go out with.
It really takes for the partner to bring out the best in you and boost your confidence. You should totally work them out. Your insecurities with other people could really bring down the relationship if left unattended.
As for jealousy, both men and women should really learn how to trust. They have to build that but trust was never as simple as “I trust you.” Even if he or she says that, trust me, there is really a little lie on that. That is why both of the partners should learn on how to make them feel secured. They should definitely clear it out that the people we interact with are just plain people in our lives. They are not as special as the ones we love.