There is a very famous quote about long distance relationships. “Distance means so little when someone means so much”. I love this quote because this is true.
My girlfriend and I have our own dreams. We plan to achieve them when we are still on or 20s or 30s. We won’t stop until we reach those goals. We have dream destinations. She wants to go to USA to visit her grandfather whom she has not seen for years. After that, she wants to travel Europe, especially Italy, the most romantic country in the world as they say. For me, I plan to tour around the country of Australia. We both want to experience all the things that our dream countries could offer. And if those dreams happen, we know that we have to face the LDL, or the long distance love.
This could happen because I believe she wants to study medicine abroad and I am not planning to intervene her study. Just the thought of us being separated by miles, lands, and the oceans pains me. Questions like, will we make it? Won’t one of us cheat? Is she going to return still single? comes to my mind every time I think of it.
That is just something that I anticipate.
So I really admire those relationships that succeed in a long distance relationship. You have to give them credit. What was their secret? How did they do it?
I think it is really simple. You just have to think again the quote I have shared at the start of this post.
If someone is truly special to you, no matter the circumstances, you will return to him or her. You would be focusing on the things you have to accomplish why you were away from her so that you could honestly return without the disgust in yourself, so you could still love your partner wholeheartedly.
Here are some of the tips that I could share for those people who are in a long distance relationship. I believe they would work for them.
1. Tell your partner that you love them. In whatever form, tell them this. In this world of Internet, I think there is no more excuses on why you cannot tell them this. Except if you really don’t feel like saying it anymore. There is always now the chat, the E-mails, the social media, or the overseas roaming services provided by telecommunications companies.
2. Stay away from the opposite sex. I think this is one of the biggest reason why long distance relationships fail. They tend to find that longing in an opposite sex “friend” to fill up the empty space left by their partners. They talk and hang out a lot until they eventually fall for each other. This complicates everything so it’s best if you stay away from a particular friend. I’m not saying it’s bad to meet new people from the opposite sex but if you want to lessen the burden of the distance, you should stay away. Be friends more with same sex. Go out with them more but don’t do things which will anger your partner if he or she ever finds out. (And if you fall for that same sex, that is completely another story!)
3. Keep them in mind. No flirting. That comment someone made on your social media profile could irritate him or her if they think that was inappropriate. So it is best to just delete them or tell those people that your partner would not like it. The case here is to prevent things from happening so that they won’t worry so much that someone is trying to get your attention. Always keep your partners in mind in whatever actions. Would she love it? Would he hate it? That is for you to answer if you really know your partner.
4. Make the most out of it. If your partner comes home in a while but will have to leave again, enjoy and make the most out of the stay of your partner. Do everything you need to do. Enjoy the cuddles and the kisses because you will certainly miss those. Try something new so that both of you will have something to share while they are away. You would also keep up the hope of trying something new to make them eager to come back.
5. Make yourself busy. You’re grown up. You know the things that would anger your partner. So no, it doesn’t mean make yourself busy with someone. If you want to try out something new, go ahead. No one would stop you.If you really love it, your partner would support you in it even if they are miles away. You would feel their support. By doing this, you avoid temptations. You would feel like you are doing something too and you are not just dependent on the outcome of your long distance relationship.
6. Challenge your partner. In relation to #5, you can challenge yourselves into achieving something new. Even in distance, you would feel that both of you are achieving a common goal. You could ask him to try hitting the gym and make his muscular form come out and he could ask you to finally learn cooking. I’m not limiting it to those thing. So that when you finally meet, you could show something to your partner. You could be proud that you’ve done what your partner have challenged you to do.
7. Talk about your future personally or virtually. Couples love doing this. This actually strengthens their relationship and a long distance love needs everything to strengthen theirs. Go on and talk about it. Design your house. Count your kids. How will things look like for you? This is a healthy form of communication for both of you.
8. Always be trusting and don’t be too jealous. Just do them if you really want your relationship to work. However, this should be mutual.
9. Give them something to hold on to. A personal object or a thing that is really important to you could make your relationship work. If they are too much valuable to you, your partner would understand that and they would care for it so much just like your relationship. In times of loneliness, they would just hold on to it and all of their sadness would be washed away. This object will surely provide your partner happiness and comfort. It would make them feel that somehow, you are with them.
10. Be positive and look forward. Each day that passes by should be an inspiration to you that you are one day closer to meeting your partner again. Try to be optimistic to the fact that your love could conquer everything including distance. Think of it as something that strengthens the relationship and not as a hindrance. You would be surprise that both of you would come out as a more mature and stronger individuals. You would be able to appreciate and value more your partner because you have missed them so much and you would rejoice to the fact that they still want you even in the long distance.
So if you would ask twentyfirstcouple if a long distance relationship could work? we wouldbe positive to that. True love could do everything. =)